Blended Families, For Her, For Him, Young Marrieds

Holiday Hope

3 Months Left

Can you believe we are already in October of 2020?  Less than 3 months left of this year.  The holidays will be upon us soon and that means families getting together, shopping, food, and all of the joys of family!  3 months to finish strong!!  What are you doing in your marriage, or with your children to finish the year with goals met?  Better health, take your career or business to the next level?  Maybe you want to take a trip?  What about some books you haven’t read?  New Years resolutions to spend more time together?  How is your marriage better since the year started?

7 Weeks

We have 7 weeks until Thanksgiving!!  It is such a wonderful time of the year, good food, possible snow if you live in the Midwest, shopping for those must-have deals, Christmas is right around the corner and you are starting your lists and checking them twice.

John goes home to see his family with his wife, they want to see everyone but no one is really talking.   They did get to see everyone, but had to see them all separately.  Then they received the news grandma June passed away.  No one had made plans to meet up and now they all meet at the funeral home, tears of regret, pain, unanswered questions, and loss.  What about your family?  How many of them are you talking to this year?  Are you all planning on getting together?  Is there strife between any of you?  What could you do in the next 7 weeks to reconcile hard feelings, forgive, and let go of the baggage of hurt?  Are you and your spouse on the same page with what you will do?

Hard Questions

These are hard questions that tend to cause a lot of tension.  I know for us we are on the same page and work well together on plans for what we want to do.  Sadly, we have some family that doesn’t get along.  Don’t we all?  My heart and prayer for this year is that we could all be together and love each other for 2 days of the year.  Sometimes hurts run deep.

Grandma June above didn’t talk to her son for years and so no family got together.  A difference of opinion.  Jason believed she was wrong for some things she said to him in the heat of the moment over some poor choices he had made, he in turn kept his family from her.  She was heart broken but felt she was right and so never picked up the phone.  I believe we can move past the hurt with the help of the Lord and a lot of mercy.  Didn’t Jesus forgive us and give us many chances?

Change

Change is so hard for some people.  It is the idea that we have to let go of being right.  To love, to be loved, to see past all of the hurts, words, wounds, and say, “I forgive you,” and “I’m sorry.”  It’s so hard to admit we are being stubborn and move into a place of forgiveness.  Jesus said if we don’t forgive others, He won’t forgive us. Can you imagine the loss and hurt Jason’s family felt not getting to see Grammy?  Is that hurt worth eternity?  Is it worth someone passing away and never being able to mend the relationship?  To be right in our own eyes?  I feel change is a must if we want to have peace and joy this season.

Too Late

What happens when it’s too late and that bitterness you have held onto so long turns into regret.  Too late happens when you least expect it.  You may be justified in what you feel that someone did to you. Jason justified his behavior and then a new feud started. John decided not to have anything to do with his brother over his mothers hurt and picked up the offense.  But is it worth it to not see your family ever again?  To hold onto the hurt you feel and felt is just like holding onto a sickness.  It won’t let you go and you won’t let it go.  It devours you like a cancer and destroys all of the good God created in family, in your marriage, and with your children.

Our Part

Whether you are a spouse, child, mother, father, family member, we have to do our part to make things better.  It’s a step of faith.  Saying I will love you and forgive you so we can have peace in our home and family.  Take a step, reach, with open arms and no malice in your heart.

Jason’s wife tried to reason with her husband and asked that they all try.  He refused and the years passed.  Cousin’s grew older and never talked.  They took up their parent’s offense and passed this bitterness onto their children.  Finally, some generations later, some of the children decided enough was enough.  What were they fighting about anyhow?  They decided to have a Christmas all together.  So much loss and pain was then overshadowed by a new found joy and hope!

How did they do this?  They started with praying, repenting, crying out to God to help them to forgive, to be forgiven, and to make a call.  What could the holidays look like if you would do the same?  Don’t wait!!!  Life is but a vapor and we aren’t promised tomorrow.  Take away the judgement and don’t think you aren’t at fault.  We all make mistakes and need a good dose of love to cover those sins!

Jesus

He is our example!!  We say we are christians, or followers of Christ, yet we ignore the truth of His word.  He loved not his own life unto death.  He said if they strike you on one cheek, turn and let him strike the other.  If someone sues you and take your clothing, let him have your coat as well.  If you are asked to go a mile with someone, don’t just go one, go two.  Jesus laid down His life for His friends.  He said Father forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing.

A big one is money, what about if they owe you, or stole from you?  Forgive them, and don’t say they owe it, make it a gift.  He was faithful and true and still is today.  You don’t have to let them walk all over you, but you do need to forgive them and love them. Make a move today!

Scripture

Monday: Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “To every [thing there is] a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: ”  Are you ready for the next season of this year? Set your heart on things above as you plan with your spouse.

Tuesday: Proverbs 13:12 says, “Hope deferred maketh the heart sick:
but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.” Don’t let hope be deferred in your marriage or family let this be a season of mending hurts.

Wednesday: Luke 6:36 says, “Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.” Remember how mercy was extended to you, extend it likewise.

Thursday: Proverbs 21:2-4 says, “Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the Lord pondereth the hearts. To do justice and judgment is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice. An high look, and a proud heart, and the plowing of the wicked, is sin.” Let us humble ourselves before God and man and set aside our differences.

Friday: Ephesians 4:31 says, “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:” Be careful with your words and put all bitterness be put away from you.

Saturday: Hebrews 11:1 says, “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Have faith when you reach out that what you are praying and reaching for will happen! God is a miracle worker!

Sunday: John 15:13 says, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”  Love covers a multitude of sins. Let’s be like Jesus this season and love our families!! Reach out in faith and hope and watch what Jesus does!!

Contact

Please feel free to contact us at janene@happilyevermarried.org and read and share more blog posts at http://happilyevermarried.org

Thank you for investing in your marriage and you too can have a happily ever married marriage!!

 

 

 

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